Pursuits: No R.S.V.P.? In Rajasthan, India, No Worries

Written By Unknown on Kamis, 14 November 2013 | 17.35

Frederic Soltan/Corbis

Indian weddings, like this one in Jaipur, can be lavish affairs with hundreds of guests. Above, a baraat, a procession to the bride's home with the groom on horseback.

In the tiniest of tailor shops in Udaipur, in the northwestern Indian state of Rajasthan, a squad of tailors chaotically fussed over me. It was the peak of autumn wedding season in 2011 and I was being fitted for a sherwani, the traditional Indian garment worn among Rajput aristocracy at Rajasthan weddings. My friend Dianne was standing in a nest of chiffon and georgette, trying on colorful saris. She was debating between the sequined turquoise and the glittery hot pink.

We had been invited to an Indian wedding. As the hand-painted invitation put it: "You're cordially invited to the wedding of Sau. Kan. Hanupriya Jodha (daughter of Rani Kiran Hada and Darbar Mahendra Vikram Singh Thi. Para) and Chi Kr Navdeep Singh (son of Shri Th. Sh. Rajendra Singh Ji Shekhawat R.P.S. Thi Khachariawas — Adopted by late Shri Th. Sh. Surendra Singh Ji Chauhan Thi Sihali at Govind Villa in Udaipur, Rajasthan, India."

The newlyweds-to-be were not old friends from college, family members or even friends of friends. Truth be told, we didn't know the bride and groom or any of their 1,000 other guests. We had been invited thanks to a New York-based tour agency called Micato Safaris, one of a handful of tour agencies that provide access to Indian weddings. Weddings in this region, which are mostly arranged, are a big deal — and for a tidy price, crashing them can be a great way to poke one's head into a rich cultural window that you won't get from a guidebook.

Wedding season in Rajasthan is October through February, peaking in late January with another spike occurring around Valentine's Day. Micato's Rajasthan tours have seen a seasonal uptick in guests' requesting access to these lavish three- to five-day ceremonies, long known to include elephants, tigers, over-the-top Bollywood dance troupes and firework displays.

"Big industrialist weddings often have Bollywood actors perform for as much as $200,000 for a five-minute gig," said Lisa Alam Shah, Micato India's Delhi-based operations manager. "Theme weddings are also getting big; my daughter attended one recently where they recreated Egypt."

Luxury tented camps, like Camp Bliss in Pushkar, have been known to invite travelers to weddings, while some travel outfitters, like Cox & Kings and Kensington Tours, scout out hotels where weddings are booked and place their guests there. "Our hotel was hosting a two-night wedding while we stayed there," said Amanda Dun, who traveled from London with Kensington in 2011, "so our guide arranged for us to watch a baraat" — a lively procession, led by the groom riding a horse, to the bride's house — "which blocked the streets with musical processions. The colors, jewelry, striking outfits and sheer number of people were astounding."

Regardless of what province, the families come from, the rolling, rusty, dusty hills of Rajasthan remain a wildly popular wedding destination. And Udaipur's Lake Pichola, festooned with Mughal palaces, is the pinnacle location, a crossroads of Indians from different castes and regions. Along its shores, a flush of lavish hotels one-up the others with fireworks displays, thumping bhangra music and Bollywood dancing. Guests wear elaborate wedding garb — Punjabis with brightly colored turbans and elaborately waxed mustaches and young women from Chennai in gold-embroidered zardozi gowns.

All weddings are different, of course, but food almost always plays a central role. However elaborate the ceremonies, much of it is homemade and served communally. It's vegetarian and delicious. Fragrant bowls of curries, stacks of nan atop silver plates, and savory biriyani in crockpots stretch over long tables. Bars are almost always free, and whiskey flows heavily.

Men and women are separate for much of the ceremony. Women gather for ornate henna bodywork in one tent, while men exchange business tips and network over whiskey and cigarettes in another. Women may enter the men's tent, but men are strictly forbidden from the women's. I warily peeked into the women's tent to check in on Dianne and witnessed women of all ages sitting in a circle painting one another with henna.

This article has been revised to reflect the following correction:

Correction: November 13, 2013


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